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Tuesday, January 3, 2017

New Year/Soft Reset Button

I'm old as dirt...fuck.

After mild stretching, cussin' at the world and popping 3 ibuprofen, my day starts...semantics of brushing teeth and shaving/whatever happens sometime between all of that.

I'm nervous about this upcoming year.

For the first time in years, I am going to attempt to release music. I have no real expectation regarding success or failure...isn't that a...um...what do they call it...based on perception? So what happens when you don't have one? I haven't wrote, or spit in years, so after writing 14 songs, I dunno what to expect. The production isn't random free beats or purchased leases this time; I actually made the instrumentals. I don't know if they will be received well or not, but I gave it some effort, so I am...concerned as to how it will be received.

Aside from that, I'm replacing furniture, getting a whip, and generally trying to be the adult people perceive me to be. Handling my shit, per say.

I'm aiming for radio play...no, I'm serious this time.

I never had real goals with music other than to make it and upload it to the internet...somehow, in my feeble mind, I was under the impression that the internets does the rest for you. Welp, that notion is gone, and I have a mild sort of intention; I am going to attempt to give my music away on the street when it's done. I don't know it that will aid me, but it surely cannot detract, so why not try it out?

A friend of mine visited me and saw I was working on this project and suggested that he may be able to help out regarding recording/getting radio play. I'm a realist, never a skeptic, so I don't know how well this will turn out, aside from doing my own due diligence and working for what I can under the impression that I have no help.

But what if?

Look nigga, I dgaf about all of that anymore. I got a nifty day job close to where I live, it pays the bills, and my focus is always my wife and kids. I rap because...well I don't even know anymore, haha. I suppose I like the act of such, or maybe have residual aspirations...I dunno, I can't quite pinpoint it.

What happened to you? Where were you?

Hmm...life? That's how I would surmise a year of unemployment, mental health issues, family drama and self discovery. I think that''s what everyone calls it nowadays anyway.


All in all, I will be chronicling my music foray, not arguing with people on the internet, and trying to find ways to better myself not just as an artist, but as a person. I don't love everyone, but wish them well this year. I hope self expectations are met for everyone.

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